"Did You Just See What I Saw?!": DYJSWIS Recommends: Greatest New York Post Headlines of All Time!

Wednesday, February 2, 2011

DYJSWIS Recommends: Greatest New York Post Headlines of All Time!

I have a confession to make: If I could choose any single job that I think would be a daily world of hilarity, I think I would choose to be a headline writer for the New York Post! The Post, for those of you who may not be aware, is NYC's most lurid tabloid, and they have a long-standing tradition of creating shocking, sometimes clever, often BRILLIANT headlines that concisely re-cap the most notable stories of the day. I read the Post every single day and several years ago started ripping and saving some of the most amusing ones. I went through that file recently and thought I'd share a few of the more memorable ones:

For some reason, this particular headline (from 1983) has gone down in tabloid history as the greatest lurid headline, ever.

This was a good one! When Paris Hilton was released from jail (again), the Post commemorated it thusly (below).

"A source" told the Post that Martha Stewart was smuggling spices into her prison cell (when she was serving her sentence for tax evasion:

Here's one of my personal favorites: The headline refers to a phony plastic surgeon who was giving "silicone" injections into women's derrieres, with very unpleasant results--and then took it on the lam:

This one's just tacky (we're talking about the Carradine story).

When the Republican National Convention was held in New York, the Post ran this story about some Texas delegates who paid a visit to Brooklyn:

In the "kinda disrespectful" category, when Yasser Arafat died, the Post ran the following front page story on his widow:

The writers pulled out all their guns on this story, about some "working girls" on Long Island, who were apparently using their hotdog cart as a front for their prostitution ring. I envision the writers jumping up and down and dancing around the room when this story broke!

The Post ran this follow-up story on Joran van der Sloot, the Dutch student suspected of killing American tourist, Natalee Holloway in Aruba:

When O.J. Simpson was convicted of kidnapping and holding several people hostage in Las Vegas in 2008, the Post finally found some justice, at last. They concisely put it like this:

"HEADLESS BODY IN TOPLESS BAR" is the title of a bound compendium of the New York Post's greatest headlines, compiled by the editors of the Post. (you can get it, in fact, on Amazon, for under 4 bucks, too! Well worth it!