Truly bizarre eBay items for sale....

For the man/woman/trannie who has everything....here are a few actual auctions going on right now that you can spend your hard-earned dough on.  GOOD LUCK BIDDING!!

ELVIS'S FACE AND PROFILE ON A CHEEZIT! 
Starting bid,  just $777.00.


The nice thing is, if you're not an Elvis fan, you can flip it around and it becomes a HAPPY FACE!

http://cgi.ebay.com/Elvis-face-and-profile-found-Large-Cheez-It-Cracker-/200572189331?pt=LH_DefaultDomain_0&hash=item2eb308ba93

A PENIS-SHAPED CHICKEN STRIP! 
Starting bid, only $95.00.


The seller describes it as "FUNKY SEXY WEIRD," so I'm not sure what it's meant to be used for.  What kind of dipping sauce would you like with that?  EWW!
http://cgi.ebay.com/Chicken-Strip-Shaped-Penis-Funky-Sexy-Weird-/170599024958?pt=LH_DefaultDomain_2&hash=item27b87e893e

YOUR VERY OWN FRENCH KISS!

http://cgi.ebay.com/french-kiss-blown-me-you-/160541395218?pt=LH_DefaultDomain_0&hash=item2561034912

A HAUNTED AND POSSESSED CAMEL! 
Opening bid, a very resonable $5,000.00!

Well, I'm assuming that's what they meant...their header reads "Haunted and POSSED camel"...something tells me that English is not their first language...or maybe it's just that they're from North Carolina.  It's really very sweet....even though it's almost guaranteed to ruin your life, this seller will donate "as an act of good faith" 50% of their profits to the St. Jude's Hospital. The description is as follows:

I dont where this thing came from and dont care it is pure EVIL! I am not into paranormal items and this thing has a definite evil presence associated with it. All I know is it came from India and it posseses some type of dark force. You have been warned and any power or darkness this thing has is all yours. 
I will mail it anyway you want and you will only pay for actual shipping 
As an act of good faith 50% of the proceeds of this auction will go to Saint Judes Children Hospital
I would say good luck but I would rather say good riddens and God bless you

http://cgi.ebay.com/Haunted-and-Possed-wooden-India-Camel-idol-/250768350841?pt=LH_DefaultDomain_0&hash=item3a62f55e79 

The seller also is offering the "BUY IT NOW" option, for only $10,000.00--in case you want your life to become a living hell immediately.


MYSTERIOUS IMAGE OF JESUS IN A WINDOW
Opening bid:  $500,000.00 (that's right...half a mil...).



"IS THAT JESUS IN THE SHED AGAIN?" Here's the description...you be the judge!  I tend to think it's REALLY HIM!!  I mean, he was born in a manger!  Why's it so hard to believe that he could be found in a shed in Connecticut?

With a little help from mother nature Jesus has made his presence known again. over the years this distinct image of jesus has formed between the pains of my old shed window. This is real!!!! It is a double pain window approx 2'x3'.because the image is inside the glass it is there for eternity. This window can be installed anywhere in your home or high above worshipers in a church steeple, thousands will gather to see this unbliveable sign from jesus letting us know that he is here with us !!

http://cgi.ebay.com/Mysterious-Image-Jesus-window-/150558192436?pt=LH_DefaultDomain_0&hash=item230df7b334